If That Were Me

"If That Were Me" is a song by English recording artist Melanie C. It was co-written and produced by Rick Nowels for her solo debut studio album Northern Star (1999). The song's lyrics address the issue of homelessness.[1]

"If That Were Me"
Single by Melanie C
from the album Northern Star
Released27 November 2000 (2000-11-27)
Recorded1999
Genre
Length4:34
LabelVirgin
Songwriter(s)
  • Melanie Chisholm
  • Rick Nowels
Producer(s)Rick Nowels
Melanie C singles chronology
"I Turn to You"
(2000)		 "If That Were Me"
(2000)		 "Here It Comes Again"
(2003)
Audio sample
  • file
  • help
Music video
"If That Were Me" on YouTube

Selected as the album's fifth and final single, it was released in November 2000. The song peaked in the UK Singles Chart at number eighteen, becoming the first of her solo singles to not reach the top five.[2] The proceeds from its sale went to the Kandu Arts charity.[3]

Critical reception

The lyrics of the song came in for particular criticism from professional music reviewers. Kurt B. Reighley wrote in CMJ New Music Monthly: "When she's singing lyrics like 'I couldn't live without my phone/ And you don't even have a home', it's tough to recall Chisholm's charms."[4] The NME's Andrew Wagstaff recommended people donate to Shelter and ridiculed the song's lyrics: "If, after doing so, you still want to hear our Mel trilling - and this is not a joke - 'I couldn't live without my phone/But you don't even have a home', well, hell, just remember that charity begins at home. So bear the neighbours in mind and wear headphones."[1] Alex Needham described the song in The Guardian as an "ode to a tramp" and suggested the aforementioned rhyming couplet was a strong contender for the worst song lyric ever.[5] Caroline Sullivan of The Guardian likened the song to Phil Collins' critically panned 1989 single "Another Day in Paradise", arguing that they both addressed homelessness with a similar lack of insight.[6] It was also chosen by The Guardian as among "the worst political lyrics in pop" in 2014.[7]

Music video

The music video, which was shot in October 2000,[8][9] shows Melanie C on the top of a factory and around urban buildings while curling her arms around herself from the cold. There are also scenes of rain in alleyways. The video on the UK CD single features scenes from the music video for Brandy and Ray J's cover of "Another Day in Paradise", but these scenes were removed from television broadcasts for copyright issues.[10][11]

Formats and track listings
European/UK CD single[12]
No.TitleLength
1."If That Were Me"4:37
2."If That Were Me" (Acoustic Version)4:32
3."When You're Gone" (Live with Bryan Adams)3:38
4."If That Were Me" (Music video)4:26
Australian CD single[13]
No.TitleLength
1."If That Were Me"4:37
2."If That Were Me" (Acoustic Version)4:32
3."When You're Gone" (Live with Bryan Adams)3:38
4."I Turn to You" (Damian LeGassick Radio Mix)3:48
5."If That Were Me" (Music video)4:26

Charts
Chart (2000–2001) Peak
position
Australia (ARIA)[14] 28
Austria (Ö3 Austria Top 40)[15] 45
Belgium (Ultratip Flanders)[16] 15
Belgium (Ultratip Wallonia)[17] 7
Europe (Eurochart Hot 100)[18] 69
Germany (Official German Charts)[19] 58
Ireland (IRMA)[20] 39
Netherlands (Dutch Top 40)[21] 14
Netherlands (Single Top 100)[22] 41
New Zealand (Recorded Music NZ)[23] 22
Scotland (OCC)[24] 23
Sweden (Sverigetopplistan)[25] 22
Switzerland (Schweizer Hitparade)[26] 50
UK Singles (OCC)[27] 18

References
  1. Wagstaff, Andrew (12 September 2005). "If That Were Me". NME. Retrieved 20 July 2015.
  2. Roberts, David (2005). Guinness World Records: British Hit Singles and Albums. Guinness World Records Limited. ISBN 978-1904994008.
  3. Bychawski, Adam (28 November 2000). "Spice Up Your Wardrobe!". NME. Retrieved 21 March 2016.
  4. Review by Kurt B. Reighley in CMJ, February 2000, p. 63.
  5. Needham, Alex (3 May 2007). "What's the worst song lyric ever?". The Guardian. Retrieved 20 July 2015.
  6. Sullivan, Caroline (19 September 2007). "I wish I'd never heard of Phil Collins ..." The Guardian. Retrieved 15 February 2014.
  7. Hogan, Michael (16 January 2014). "Terrible topical lyrics in pop: which are the worst?". The Guardian. Retrieved 9 November 2015.
  12. "Melanie C — If That Were Me (European/UK CD Single)". Discogs. Retrieved 19 November 2015.
  13. "Melanie C — If That Were Me (Australian CD Single)". Discogs. Retrieved 19 November 2015.
  14. "Australian-charts.com – Melanie C – If That Were Me". ARIA Top 50 Singles. Retrieved 28 December 2015.
  15. "Austriancharts.at – Melanie C – If That Were Me" (in German). Ö3 Austria Top 40. Retrieved 28 December 2015.
  16. "Ultratop.be – Melanie C – If That Were Me" (in Dutch). Ultratip. Retrieved 28 December 2015.
  17. "Ultratop.be – Melanie C – If That Were Me" (in French). Ultratip. Retrieved 28 December 2015.
  18. "Eurochart Hot 100 Singles" (PDF). Music & Media. Vol. 18 no. 4. 20 January 2001. p. 18. Retrieved 19 December 2020.
  19. "Offiziellecharts.de – Melanie C – If That Were Me". GfK Entertainment Charts. Retrieved 29 November 2018.
  20. "Irish-charts.com – Discography Melanie C". Irish Singles Chart. Retrieved 20 January 2020.
  21. "Nederlandse Top 40 – week 1, 2001" (in Dutch). Dutch Top 40 Retrieved 29 November 2018.
  22. "Dutchcharts.nl – Melanie C – If That Were Me" (in Dutch). Single Top 100. Retrieved 28 December 2015.
  23. "Charts.nz – Melanie C – If That Were Me". Top 40 Singles. Retrieved 22 January 2016.
  24. "Official Scottish Singles Sales Chart Top 100". Official Charts Company. Retrieved 22 January 2016.
  25. "Swedishcharts.com – Melanie C – If That Were Me". Singles Top 100. Retrieved 22 January 2016.
  26. "Swisscharts.com – Melanie C – If That Were Me". Swiss Singles Chart. Retrieved 29 December 2015.
  27. "Official Singles Chart Top 100". Official Charts Company. Retrieved 20 November 2015.
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